Dustup.

You know what makes for a hot mess? Chalk.

Dude, chalk is messy. And dusty. Here's a tip: don't try to wipe chalk dust off wood furniture with a wet cloth. The resulting white chalk paste smeared all over your wood furniture is next to impossible to remove. Just blow that crap off onto the floor and hope the vacuum gets it.*

Helpful cleaning tips from Abby, certified professional homemaker! You're welcome. 

Anyway. Wondering why all the talk about chalk?

Well, I finally got around to one of those home projects I've been blathering on/doing nothing about for the last six months: a chalkboard in my dining room.

First off, I know. A chalkboard is not standard dining room fare. But let's review my goals for this redecorating initiative, shall we?

- Colorful
- Kid-friendly
- More "me"
- Cheap

What screams "color" or "me" more than a chalkboard?

Well, lots of things, since chalkboards are black and I haven't used one in 20+ years. But I loved the idea of having a focal point that could be updated regularly, changed seasonally, and used for fun family-friendly things like quotes, scripture, game night score-keeping, party menus, birthday greetings, etc.

I found my inspiration on Pinterest:

Paint the glass of a Goodwill picture with chalkboard paint and hang it. Great in theory, harder in practice. Our buffet is pretty wide, and I wanted to fill most of the space above it. I searched high and low for something that would work, but couldn't find a frame that was large enough. So, my plan changed: paint the wall and draw a frame around it with chalk.

At this point I will confess to having ZERO drawing skills. Fine motor is not my bag, though I like to keep torturing myself with projects that involve tiny details. Thank heavens I go to Goodwill regularly and stumbled upon this hunk of junk before remembering I have no skills and attempting to draw myself a frame:

 

Yep, a gigantic bulletin board falling out of its frame. You know what they say: another elementary school's trash is some crazy lady's treasure! It wasn't the ornate frame I envisioned, but I knew it would work just fine. Especially once I got it painted. Because, you know...color.

We hung the frame, traced it, taped it off, and painted it with five coats of chalkboard paint. Good thing chalkboard paint dries quickly, because it turns out I have no patience.

During the brief period of drying time/frantic pacing, I spray-painted my frame a gorgeous mustard yellow. I loved the way it looked drying on my garage floor and was so excited to hang it up.

Wah wah wah.

It looked terrible. Granted, this is a terrible picture of it in terrible lighting, but I guess that's good because it kind of expresses the terribleness of that color against my walls.

Yuck.

I tried to like it. I thought maybe I just needed to push myself, because change is hard for me and it can take me a while to adjust to the idea of something new. So we sat it there for a bit and then I said to Nate "It's not right. Do you think it's right? It can't be right. What do you think? I just don't know, but I'm pretty sure it's not right."

I'll spare you the details of what turned into a riveting spousal discussion.**

Nate (eventually) agreed that it wasn't right, but I think he was willing to keep it if it meant him not having to deal with my incessant questions or another round of painting indecision. But the perfectionist in me won just as it should, and the following weekend I repainted it white.
 

NOW it's right.

I know, I know...a black chalkboard with a white frame does not really meet the colorful criteria. It's the exact opposite of colorful. But it's kid-friendly, and it's definitely me. Plus the neutral frame means I can do a lot with my lamps and other accessories. In addition to clashing terribly with my walls, that yellow would have tied me to a very specific color palette. Repainting was a good decision.

So, there's a chalkboard in my dining room. And next to it, some lamps that look awful. But don't worry — I have plans for those.

Whether or not I will carry out those plans before 2021, well that's the question.

--

* Somewhere Martha is having a heart attack, but I'm pretty sure she has people to deal with her white chalk paste disasters, whereas I just have me and a dollar store "magic eraser."***

** Argument.

***The quotes are because it's probably not called a magic eraser at the dollar store. It's most likely called a wizard sponge or delete-a-mark pad or something equally stupid. But man if they don't work just as well at a fraction of the price. I make an extra stop for those suckers. And the "floor dusting sheets" aka swiffer cloths.

Progress report.

My house is a mess.

And I'm not talking about a "stuff strewn about" kind of mess (please never open my bedroom door). We are fairly tidy and try really hard to stay on top of the day-to-day clutter because when four people and a dog share 1200 square feet and one bathroom, it gets ugly pretty quickly. Think nightmarish stacks of school papers and overflowing laundry baskets and piles of playground pebbles and lots and lots of dog hair.

Oh, the dog hair. Yeah, we have to stay on top of that. Both for physical and mental health reasons. But, I digress.

The mess to which I'm currently referring is more of a "what in heaven's name is happening in here?" kind of mess.

I'll tell you what's happening in here ("here" being my first floor): I've lost my everloving mind.

Remember that challenge I gave myself earlier this year? The one about injecting color into my drab, tan house through thrift store shopping and DIY projects?

Idiotic. Turns out I love tan. Tan's my favorite. You know why? Because loving tan means I DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING ELSE.

Seriously, who has time for this? When am I supposed to thrift and craft and paint and sew? I currently have about 52 minutes between Calvin actually going to sleep (vs. when we put him to bed an hour and eight minutes earlier) and me actually going to sleep. And call me crazy, but I prefer to use those 52 minutes to shovel ice cream in my mouth, flip through my secondhand copies of People, and half-watch The Bridge.

Occasionally, though, I find a burst of energy and wholly devote myself to this project. This typically occurs on nights when Nate isn't home. Then he comes home, looks from me to the mess I've made, raises an eyebrow, and says "whatcha doin'?"

Nate's "whatcha doin'?" is the equivalent of "what in heaven's name is happening in here?"

A fair question, and one I ask myself pretty much every time I walk in the front door these days.

On one such evening, I took down everything on my living and dining room walls. That was in June. Guess what's hanging on my walls now? Nails.

I also purchased some fabric and folded it around a curtain rod just to get a feel for how it would look in my entryway window. Three weeks ago. It's still there. And it must look okay because last weekend my mother-in-law said "oh, you got your curtain done!" Um, no. I got my fabric shoved up in that window. But if no one can tell the difference between something I've sewn and something I shoved, why bother sewing it?

And let's not get started on the insane mix of styles represented in my house right now. Modern, vintage, and traditional do not work as well together in one room (or one house) as you might think. Every time I change one thing, I realize I need to change ten more for it to work.

Thus the mess.

In all seriousness, redecorating is hard work. Really hard. When your goal is to make your house more colorful and family-friendly and everything you own is dark wood and breakable and you don't have money to buy all new stuff, well...it takes some doing.

I'm totally frustrated, but I know this has been good for me. It's helping me realize that matching does not always equal style, that nothing bad is going to happen if I take some chances and come up with crazy combinations that appeal to me and no one else, and that the beauty of our home is the result of how we live in it — not how we decorate it.

Of course we all know I will be freaking out trying to make sense of this disaster before my sister-in-law's baby shower next month.

Or maybe not. Maybe I'll just do what I did before Audra's party and take everything down. I'm halfway there already.

Bam! Pow! Zip! Calvin's superhero party.

This kid of mine is all about superheroes right now. I'm not entirely sure when or how this obsession began, but I believe it might have something to do with his underwear.

Nothing cuter than a tiny tush with Spider-Man on it.*

Given his recent interest in masked crusaders, a superhero party seemed like the clear choice for Calvin's fourth birthday. He was pumped. I was, too. I know people think I'm crazy and over-the-top with these parties (I know this because they tell me so) but I love it. I do it for my kids, obviously, but I also do it for me. There is nothing I love more than shopping, crafting, and setting a table,** which are three of the four pillars of birthday parties.

The fourth, of course, is food. While I love that pillar with my whole heart, I do not love cooking that pillar. So this year I decided to focus my time on things I enjoy, like making skyscrapers out of cardstock, and pay people to do the rest. I ordered a three-foot sub from Subway and cupcakes from Byerly's. The rest of the food was limited to stuff that required little to no effort: pb&j for the kids, carrots and dip in cups, watermelon,  chips/cheese balls/goldfish in little boxes, Izze sodas, and SuperV juice boxes.

Food: DONE.

(Party guest alert: You can expect this same spread at all future parties. Sorry, my creativity does not extend to the food portion of the program.)

The decorations were also simple and inexpensive. I ordered the invitations from Tiny Prints, and added a favorite picture of Calvin running around the yard in a cape to the back. The red tablecloth was purchased for Calvin's Mickey Mouse birthday party a few years ago. I bought two yards of superhero fabric from JoAnn Fabrics, trimmed the selvage, and used it as a runner. The centerpiece is 11x17 black cardstock I folded like an accordion, then cut into skyscraper shapes along one side. The windows were drawn with a white paint pen. The cupcake wrappers, toppers, and sprinkles were from Etsy (thanks for the gift card, mom and dad!), as were the felt star and lighting bolt bunting strung across the mirror and Calvin's birthday shirt. I found free superhero saying printables online, printed them and stuck them on wooden skewers in the sandwich. The mini superhero figurines, star/4 candles, punch balloons, and streamers were purchased at Dollar Tree. The plates and black and white polka dot napkins were from Target.

Outside, we hung superhero sayings along the fence. I bought six sheets of poster board at Dollar Tree, along with a three-pack of permanent markers. I freehanded the words, scribbled them in with marker, and then cut jagged edges around them. Took me all of 20 minutes.

My biggest project was cape-making. I made nine capes in various colors and sizes so each guest (ranging from 5 months to 5 years) would have their very own. I found a no-sew tutorial online, but decided to sew the shields, stars, and velcro on to make them a little nicer. (My mother-in-law helped immensely by sewing on the stars/shields.) The cost of felt and velcro for nine capes? $12...and I have a bunch left over because I wanted more variety in the colors. Talk about a cheap favor.

Finally, I wrote a newspaper article about our little superhero. My collegiate newspaper editing and layout skills came in pretty handy there...amazing how something can come back to you after all those um, uh...couple of years.***

 

*Except maybe a Spider-Man costume wedged into a tiny tush.

Our happy, partied-out four-year-old.

All in all, this was probably the least amount of time and money I've put into a party (minus the streamers, those were a pain), but I think it was one of my favorites...and I'm pretty sure Super Calvin would agree.

 **Except Jesus. And my family. And diet coke.
***TWELVE. How have I been out of college for twelve years?

Resources
Superhero invitations
Superhero cupcake toppers
Black star cupcake wrappers
Superhero bunting
Superhero sprinkles
Superhero birthday shirt
Superhero cape tutorial
Superhero printables
Mini popcorn boxes

16 months.

October 2011 is when Calvin transitioned to his big boy bed. I was seven months pregnant.

February 2013 is when I finished his big boy room. Audra will be 14 months old tomorrow.

I think the word you're looking for is efficient.

(Or lazy.)

Anyway, Calvin's room is finally mostly done. I say "mostly" because I am a futzer and nothing is ever really done at our house (more to come on that soon). But it's to a point where I have declared it both cute and good enough for a three-year-old, so I may as well show it to you.

The view from the door. The race track is a decal from The Land of Nod. The picture is from Target and I don't love it and it's not big enough for that space (futzer!) but it does the job. 

This is actually my childhood bed frame. It's iron, which is pretty much ideal for toddler boys (and preteen girls who like to put stickers on their headboard). Nate spray painted it red. The quilt is from The Land of Nod, and I got into a pretty decent bidding war over that thing on Ebay. I emerged victorious, and paid half off retail for it. Score! Dinosaur sheets are from Target.

Opposite the bed is my good enough wall. (Okay, here's what really bothers me: I want to put that racetrack decal around the entire room but it's like $40 a set and I need three and I just can't justify that cost for a toddler bedroom. I'd like to say I will add to it over time but since it's already been up for a year and I haven't added to it, that seems unlikely. Instead, it will just annoy me until we redecorate.) The metal signs are from The Land of Nod. The enormous navy polka dot piggy bank is from HomeGoods. Lamp is from Target. Dresser is from Ikea (notice there is no closet in this tiny room. Luckily his clothes are still pretty small and he's a boy. This would not work for Audra.)

To the left of his dresser is a little wooden hook I found at Goodwill for $1.50 and painted red. I love having his dress-up clothes accessible and not tucked away in some bin. (Mostly because his room is tiny and there is a lot of other stuff to tuck into bins.)

His preschool teacher traced him last fall, then sent home this ginormous piece of paper. I felt bad throwing it (him?) out, so I hung it on the back of the door. It's kind of creepy. Especially at night.

The heart of his room: books and toys. And a clock he can't read.

We turned an Ikea Expedit shelf on its side. His bigger toys are housed on top (perfect height for play), his books are on the middle shelves, and his smaller toys are in fabric bins below. Trains are in clear storage containers under the bed.

His reading nook. Mostly I sit in that chair and nag him to get dressed, or he sits in that chair and pouts during time out, but sometimes we actually sit in that chair to cuddle and read (intended use). The blanket on the chair was mine as a baby, and is made out of the cutest vintage (well, now it's vintage because I'm old) alphabet fabric. The chair and curtains are from Ikea.

I made the bunting out of ricrac and felt. Hand sewing is my favorite! (No. It's not.) The bulletin board is from Target and showcases pictures, notes, and his favorite craft projects from school.

The collage features some of my favorite Calvin works of art in super inexpensive Ikea frames. The C is a three dimensional cardboard letter from JoAnn — I painted the edges red and Mod Podged striped fabric to the front. The Story People print I got when I was pregnant with him still hangs in the corner.

His room is super tiny and it took me 16 months to finish it. I am really the worst at stuff like this. But I think I achieved what I set out to accomplish — a happy, inspiring, creative space where my Bub can relax and play and I can get annoyed about small pictures and insufficient wall decals.