A true story.

I was in the mall today, just minding my own business, and OUT OF NOWHERE a Banana Republic employee jumped me, dragged me inside the store, made me try on a really cute shirt, stole my check card, purchased the really cute shirt with it, forced me to sign the credit card slip, and then handed it to me in a little bag and told me to have a nice day.

What on earth am I going to do with this super cute shirt I was TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY FORCED to purchase?

They'd better hope I don't sue for harassment.

I'm posting the picture below just in case the police need it for their report. Except mine is kelly green, and I so wouldn't wear it tucked in. You know, hypothetically speaking. If I wore it. Which, of course, I wouldn't. Stolen goods and all. But then again, I did technically pay for it...