Birthmas.

Audra here. Just wanted to let you all know that what they say is true: Christmas birthdays are the worst.

Nobody takes time to celebrate you, because they're too preoccupied with the holidays.

You don't even get a homemade cake, just some grocery store cupcake that originally had a plastic martini glass stuck on it. And then everyone STARES at you like you're some kind of freak while singing an unintelligible song.

Seriously, lady. WHAT?

Okay, fine. I guess the grocery store cupcake wasn't that bad.

But no one bothers to dress up for your birthday dinner...or even smile at the camera for pictures. Just look at these weirdos. (Help, help, someone help. I'll just keep clapping until I get some help.)

You can't get the dang cards open, no matter how much you shake them. And no one buys you anything because they've already gotten you Christmas presents. I mean, look at that pathetic pile of "birthday" gifts. You know as well as I do that everyone split up the cost of my Christmas gifts between both holidays.

Plus the grownups hoard the real cake for themselves. Oh, and your mom forgets to take a picture until after she cuts into it, because you know, CHRISTMAS.

Like I said. The WORST.

Except for the cupcake. That was alright, I guess.

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Audra's 12 month stats: 21lbs 1oz (49th), 31 inches (90th)