Well played.

Pop quiz: Which recently rebuked-by-me retailer is a very bad listener?

Let me give you a clue:


















SHAME ON YOU, MR. BODEN.

The fact is, I brought this upon myself. I clearly stated that we might be able to work something out if he came back with a 40% discount. And that charming, wily man one-upped me by offering 50%.

If there's anything we've learned this week, it's that you should never underestimate the power of the tiny family blog.

Well played, Mr. Boden. My closet thanks you. My self-control does not.

Dear John(nie).

Dear Johnnie Boden:

Please stop sending me emails. Or at least emails including offers I can't refuse.

You see, I am poor. Well, not really poor, but I'm paying an arm and a leg for daycare and diapers every month, and I just got the first of what I have to assume will be multiple student loan balance letters regarding my husband's recently completed education. There is no room for you and your 30% off plus free shipping in my life.

Gosh, 30% off is a really good deal. That means the Amalfi dress I've been eying would only be $70....NO. NO NO NO.

No thank you, Mr. Boden!

You are preying on my weaknesses. Somehow, without even having met, you know I cannot turn away from tiny striped jeans for my son, or adorable printed skirts for me. You know I find your soft cotton fabrics and your whimsical polka dot packaging irresistible. You know I love putting Calvin in shirts that say delightful things like "Pony Ride."

But I cannot continue this relationship with you and your beguiling goods. Truly, I cannot. Please, take your 30% off plus free shipping (Free shipping! Shipping is a significant expense when you're ordering things from England, that's a serious cost savings...) and, well, you know. Keep it. For a while. Just hang on to it for me. I won't always be poor. And when I'm not, well...you and I are going to get to know each other very well.

Until then, dear Johnnie, I remain yours truly,

Abby

P.S. If you bumped the offer up to 40% plus free shipping and free returns we might be able to work something out much sooner. Just saying.